Sunday, November 25
i need to stop being so soft-hearted. each time i harden, i see you and then i start crawling back.
these few days have been like a trance. i've lost track of time wahah and apparently my health. falling in and out of sickness or however u call it for the past few days. yes the headache and the blocked nose. or maybe it's my music withdrawal (because try as i might, i cant study and listen to music at the same time) or maybe its my family withdrawal.
i miss my family.
i miss waking up at home and instead of brushing teeth first i sit and play with my rabbits. yes those poor little things that have to live with my horrible breath and horrible voice that i use with them. IT'S NATURAL TO TALK TO BABIES AND ANIMALS WITH A HIGH-PITCHED VOICE MIXED WITH A MALAYSIAN ACCENT OKAY!
SCIENTISTS HAVE FOUND OUT THAT IT RESEARCH HAS SHOWN THAT IT IS TRUE!
and yes, i am that scientist.
and i miss the rest of them. it's nice that my mum openly stalks me on facebook and twitter and everything else. she makes me feel like i'm worth the love. yes, i am worth it.
and it's nice that my dad is very concerned but just doesnt show. (it's just a family culture dont ask how or why) so when i talk to my mum about my problems he tries to listen in. funny how it's almost as though his ears are stretching out due to his earnest attempts to listen. so i speak up to make it more comfortable for him.
wah and my mum has to choose this time. right at this moment to call when i'm at the peak of my stress level and scold me about leaving the mahjiong tiles at weiyang house. congratulations germaine, a nice little vulnerable moment you have there, facing your lappie and kaixi's backview in the background. yes breathe in, out, and moving on...
the weekend at home was a great break. i had a lot of fun! talking to my rabbits, making sad faces at my brother so that he would let me watch the show that he JUST finished watching with the line "but i only come home once a week!" it always works ;) then i spent an awesomely quiet saturday morning and afternoon at home. tried to do fom but ended up playing piano, and then the guitar, and then my rabbits, and then my piano looked fun again.
i think i've been watching too many covers lately.
but just saying, savannah outen is my god.
laughed at 7:17:00 PM